With a stammer, I am predisposed to be opposed to doing presentations. Of course, they are not any fun for most people. I try to face these challenges head on, even if I expect failure – probably not the best principle to exercise. But repeated failure eventually reaches a point of ‘too much’.
My first two presentations were not pleasing to me. Not only because of my delivery but because of teamwork dynamics and the timeframe for composition (around 1 hour). I feel that I currently need more time than that to create a decent presentation but expect to improve my workrate over time, by refining my tackling of the challenging last-minute presentation preparation, hopefully resulting in me delivering an ecstasy-inducing presentation before the end of term.
Teamwork is fine for me, but proves to be testing when roles aren’t defined. I cannot understand how equality can be found in a system of dictation without an organising system in place. Tempted to just take orders, I struggle to be heard or understood – only finding influence in the initiation phase of a teamwork operation, when others don’t know how to start. I’m currently unsure as to how to resolve this issue but am looking forward to finding out.
For me to feel close to ‘secure’ in a presentation, I need some sort of script, a plan of the presentation and the assurance that all objectives are met. Previously, my teams have hit the ‘hour-mark’ without any of those things. If these inadequacies continue to exist, I will be further deterred. I must resist any temptation to become more introverted and work to get those ‘comforts’ done in the future, possibly attempting to delegate my team members towards those specific aims.
Here’s hoping for the future…